My in laws are broke and husband and his siblings want to buy them a house?

I have no problem helping those in need but just a quick background. My in-laws don't like me because I live in another state and they all still live in the same town. They boast about how great they are, the town they live in and how much they love one another. Then open your door to your parents and let them live with you. My husband's siblings also tell us how rich they are and did not help us when my husband was out of job. I just sold our home in another state because my husband was relocated. That means I will have to use my equity to buy them an apt and buy less of a home. I want to help but I have a family to take care of and a home to buy for my family. Am I being unreasonable? If they love one another, they are so rich, than pick up the tab especially since they do not include my husband in any of the decisions UNLESS they want money.My in laws are broke and husband and his siblings want to buy them a house?
you are not unreasonable and I hope your husband is on the same page as you are......your family must come first, then if you have a couple hundred dollars you can spare to help them out, send it to them....otherwise, forget it!My in laws are broke and husband and his siblings want to buy them a house?
I say HELL to the NO! Lol
you are not unreasonable at all. Look they are responsible for their own financail state. help if you can, but don't dig yourself into a hole doing so
you got that right, tell them to put there money were their mouth is, you have a family who needs a home, and your family comes first always remember that!his parents will figure somethin out! they made it this far!!!!
Would u help ur parents? Would u do whatever u could if your parents were possibly going to be put out on the street? Id be willing to guess that u probably would if the roles were reversed. No matter how they treated ur husband, or how rich ur siblings were u'd atleast want to try and do something.. even if it was just giving enough money to say pay for first and last months rent.. or possibly adding a room onto a new house for them to stay.. u cant blame ur husband for loving his parents and feeling obligated to help them, AND NO u shouldnt put your own family at risk, but whatever u can do with out putting them at risk you should let ur husband do what he feels he needs to do.. they are his parents and i doubt u'd want him trying to tell u what u could do or couldnt do for your folks..
You are correct. You have your own family which should come first. Your family and welfare are your priorities and you are not obligated to take care of your in-laws, especially people who have no regard for you....
Talk to your husband about this tell him exactly what you told us. If he still insist just tell him later on not to complain about money problems.
Seriously think about what you would do if it were your parents.



Then ask yourself those questions.



Your answer should be no different between the two.



EDIT: I can only think that by getting a thumbs down that husband's parents would not be treated equally as your own parents in your relationship.
Think about what your saying. Sometimes you have to step back from the situation and see it before you can actually decide anything. My ex-in-laws were the same way. They had more pain, more needs, more medical issues, had worse car accidents, worked harder, cooked better and so on and so forth...then anyone else. They never liked me.



You are right about you and your family coming first. Your husband's responsibility is to you first, then to them. Compromise and donate what you feel comfortable with and leave it up to the other siblings to take care of the rest. Your never going to give enough or do it at the right time or anything else....so....make up your mind what your willing to do because you love your husband.



Tell him to blame you. They will anyway.



Accept what you cannot change.



Change what you can.



Have the wisdom to know the difference.



That saying is from AA and helped me out a lot. Although, I don't follow my own advise sometimes. lol
Dont do it. You're right to feel the way you do.
Do not spend a dime of that equity on your in-laws. The bottom line is that you have to take care of yourself first---and so I would not participate in this. You do not even need any specific reason to excuse yourself. It is your family that comes first, second, and last, and maybe if you got something left over you can do something else whith that...but don't give it to the in-laws!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I would explain truthfully that if I spend my house money on them then I have to pay taxes on it, as do they. So, for the good of the family, sorry, no free house.
I don't think you're not being unreasonable. I can understand that he wants to help. And when it comes to family that it isn't always 'quid pro quo'. You have your own family to take care of. And it shouldn't be shared equally among the siblings. To be fair, you're not in the same financial situation. And they should be reminded of that. By no means do I think that he shouldn't help out. But he has his own family to take care of and he has to think of them first.
You are not being unreasonable, you have to take care of your family before you can help anyone else.